32: How to Feel Proud of Yourself

Andrea Liebross | www.andrealiebross.com | Episode 32

Speaker1: [00:00:08] You are listening to the Time to level up podcast, I'm your host business life coach, Andrea Libros. I help women in business

Speaker2: [00:00:18] Commit to their own growth personally and professionally. Each week I'll bring you strategies to help you think clearly, gain confidence, make your time productive, turn every obstacle into an opportunity, and finally overcome the overwhelmed so that you can make money and manage life. Let's create a plan so you have a profitable business, successful career, and best of all, live with unapologetic ambition. Are you ready to drop the drama and figure out the how in order to reach your goals? You're in the right place. It's time to level up.

[00:00:57] Let's do this.

Speaker1: [00:01:05] So hello, my friends, welcome to the Time to Level Up podcast in today, we are going to talk about how to be proud of yourself. But first, I want to tell you that this is Episode 32, and I can't believe that I've created thirty two episodes. I am proud of that. And this all happened in just about six months. And I will say, reflecting back when I recorded my first episodes in November that aired in December,

Speaker3: [00:01:36] You know,

Speaker1: [00:01:37] I think I've gotten a lot better at this. So I am proud of myself. And as a celebration, I want to take this podcast to what I would consider the next level and introduce

Speaker3: [00:01:48] A coach with

Speaker1: [00:01:49] Me S.. So somewhere in each podcast I

Speaker3: [00:01:53] Am going to say coach with me.

Speaker1: [00:01:54] And this is where I might pose a question of you to ponder. And it's going to be on something that relates obviously to the topic.

Speaker3: [00:02:03] But it is something that I bet

Speaker1: [00:02:05] You really could benefit from coaching

Speaker3: [00:02:07] On, meaning

Speaker1: [00:02:08] That pausing. So you're not just listening, but listening and then pausing at that coach with me section and really pondering the question. And whatever that question is, I would love for you to connect with

Speaker3: [00:02:20] Me and share

Speaker1: [00:02:21] Your answer or your thoughts through D.M. on Insta or messaging on

Speaker3: [00:02:27] Facebook or

Speaker1: [00:02:28] Email,

Speaker3: [00:02:29] Whatever.

Speaker1: [00:02:30] Share with me how you would respond or what your response is to that coach with me section and I will respond back to you and coach you. So listen up for that new section in each podcast following this one. I also would love to invite you to share with me topics that you want to hear about, because I am always curious.

Speaker3: [00:02:51] So again,

Speaker1: [00:02:52] Direct messaged me. Let me know.

Speaker3: [00:02:54] All right. So being

Speaker1: [00:02:55] Proud of yourself is something that I have been thinking about a lot, because as a coach and as a teacher, I want to always encourage you to feel proud of yourself and to feel

Speaker3: [00:03:07] Empowered. And I,

Speaker1: [00:03:09] In fact, start off pretty much every coaching session with my clients and

Speaker3: [00:03:14] Say, what

Speaker1: [00:03:15] Are we celebrating?

Speaker3: [00:03:16] And often this is

Speaker1: [00:03:18] The hardest question I ask in the

Speaker3: [00:03:20] Entire session, because it is

Speaker1: [00:03:22] Not often that we ask

Speaker3: [00:03:23] Ourselves,

Speaker1: [00:03:24] What am I celebrating, what am I proud of? And something I've noticed in my own life, with my own

Speaker3: [00:03:29] Success, with my

Speaker1: [00:03:30] Own choices

Speaker3: [00:03:31] Is that not

Speaker1: [00:03:33] Everyone likes it when you're proud of yourself or celebrating or finding joy in something. I've discussed this with my clients many times. And how many times have you had someone ask you? So how's it going? How's like, for example, for me, how that coaching business going? And I would love to respond and say it's great. I had ten clients today who I helped. I have had a profitable month. I've produced thirty two podcasts, but I usually don't say all that. I find myself downplaying my success. So I wanted to give you and myself some teaching that might help you navigate this a little bit more deliberately and with intention. So I think

Speaker3: [00:04:20] Generally one of the

Speaker1: [00:04:21] Societal norms in our culture is don't brag or

Speaker3: [00:04:25] Boast, particularly

Speaker1: [00:04:26] I think as

Speaker3: [00:04:27] Women it's

Speaker1: [00:04:29] Don't really enhance your accomplishments. So if you've heard of the studies out there that talk about how, generally speaking, men will apply for

Speaker3: [00:04:37] Jobs and not

Speaker1: [00:04:38] Meet the qualifications given for the job when

Speaker3: [00:04:41] Applying, but

Speaker1: [00:04:42] Have no reservations about

Speaker3: [00:04:44] That, whereas

Speaker1: [00:04:45] Women tend to generally do the opposite, they want to make sure they're overqualified before even applying. And when I have a client who's looking for a new job, they often are quick to point out to me why that job is not for them or why they definitely won't get an interview because they don't have all one thousand things listed as the qualifications. So it's just something to notice. It doesn't have to be that you have to go out and solve this for the world. I just want you to notice that even in a job

Speaker3: [00:05:15] Situation, we are

Speaker1: [00:05:16] Not necessarily as women proud of all the things we have accomplished. We focus on all the things we haven't. So are you someone who downplays your accomplishments? Are you someone who isn't comfortable thinking that you're amazing and talking about being amazing, or are you someone

Speaker3: [00:05:37] Who downplays

Speaker1: [00:05:39] Joyfulness that has to particularly do with you, not your kids

Speaker3: [00:05:44] Or not

Speaker1: [00:05:44] Someone else? And I find it fascinating that there's this sort of

Speaker3: [00:05:48] Paradox that I've been noticing,

Speaker1: [00:05:50] That as a society we all want to encourage each other to be successful with whatever that means to you, whatever your definition of success is. And think about all those motivational quotes you see on.

Speaker3: [00:06:03] Social media, I love a good

Speaker1: [00:06:05] Motivational

Speaker3: [00:06:06] Quote, too, but think about those, we're always

Speaker1: [00:06:08] Trying to motivate people to be successful. And it could be that you're defining success as being a

Speaker3: [00:06:16] Doctor or being a

Speaker1: [00:06:17] Lawyer or being a

Speaker3: [00:06:18] Coach.

Speaker1: [00:06:19] Sometimes in my industry, they say, are fully booked coach. Or it could be that you want to switch careers or it could be that you want to create X number of dollars in sales, or

Speaker3: [00:06:30] It could be that you want to be

Speaker1: [00:06:32] A stay at home mom. And it could be that you just got promoted. It could be you just started your own business. It could be that you completed a triathlon, OK? Success doesn't necessarily mean a certain type of success. I just want you to kind of think of success as whatever you define it

Speaker3: [00:06:48] As something that you've accomplished

Speaker1: [00:06:50] And as a society, particularly in the U.S., we want to encourage you to

Speaker3: [00:06:55] Pursue that success.

Speaker1: [00:06:57] But then here's where the paradox comes in. Once you are successful in that space, again, it could be anything. It could be money, family health.

Speaker3: [00:07:06] Once you have

Speaker1: [00:07:07] It, once

Speaker3: [00:07:08] You've created it, people

Speaker1: [00:07:09] Aren't as happy for you as you might have expected. And I think this comes from our natural tendency to connect over problems, but not so much over successes.

Speaker3: [00:07:21] So if you notice

Speaker1: [00:07:22] This, we love to connect with others over similar problems. So if you have a problem with your teenage kids and I have a problem with my teenage kids, we can connect over that. Or if you have a problem or challenge being an entrepreneur and I have the same challenge, we can connect over it. Remember when you potentially were single, if you're married now, when you were single, you may have had a lot more single friends because you connected over being single.

Speaker3: [00:07:53] You had the same

Speaker1: [00:07:54] Sort of problems in

Speaker3: [00:07:55] That area. And when my

Speaker1: [00:07:56] Kids were itty

Speaker3: [00:07:57] Bitty, all of

Speaker1: [00:07:58] My friends had itty

Speaker3: [00:08:00] Bitty kids. Right. So when someone is not

Speaker1: [00:08:03] In the same stage of life or business or in the same situation

Speaker3: [00:08:08] That may

Speaker1: [00:08:08] Not be having the same problems, you might find yourself

Speaker3: [00:08:12] Saying, I don't

Speaker1: [00:08:13] Really want to hang out with that person. We have nothing to talk about. So the same is true with working full time. Or maybe it's money. They don't have as much money

Speaker3: [00:08:24] As we do, or they have

Speaker1: [00:08:26] More money than we do for your health. Yeah, that person's always going to the gym and I'm not. And when you find another person or group of people that have

Speaker3: [00:08:36] Suffered in a similar way, there is a

Speaker1: [00:08:38] Connection over the suffering. And that's not a bad thing. I actually think it can be helpful, really. If you're going through a hard time, it can be very helpful. But where it becomes a problem is when you start to do that to your own detriment, when you don't see that that

Speaker3: [00:08:55] Connection and that

Speaker1: [00:08:56] Emphasis over the problem is the exact

Speaker3: [00:08:59] Reason why you can't

Speaker1: [00:09:02] Create the solution. So you're so focused on being single, for

Speaker3: [00:09:07] Example, you're likely not finding your mate or if you're so

Speaker1: [00:09:11] Focused on not being able to lose weight, that emphasis on the problem of not being able to lose weight is not going to help you lose. It's going to get in the way of you creating the result you want, which is actually to lose weight. So it's that shift in identity from I'm just someone who's overweight and struggles with losing

Speaker3: [00:09:31] Weight to

Speaker1: [00:09:32] Someone who loves

Speaker3: [00:09:33] My body, who's lost the weight.

Speaker1: [00:09:35] So most of us haven't thought about what it's like to not have our current problem and to

Speaker3: [00:09:41] Feel how we

Speaker1: [00:09:42] Want to feel

Speaker3: [00:09:43] Without the problem.

Speaker1: [00:09:45] And if you have ever achieved

Speaker3: [00:09:47] Something, which I know you all have,

Speaker1: [00:09:49] You may have found yourself not really

Speaker3: [00:09:52] Indulging in the achievement or the

Speaker1: [00:09:55] Success or the accomplishment

Speaker3: [00:09:57] Of it in sort of

Speaker1: [00:09:58] Downplaying it and staying more in the problem. So it might sound like for me it might say, oh,

Speaker3: [00:10:05] Yes, I went to Dartmouth

Speaker1: [00:10:07] College, but I'm not that smart or good at standardized

Speaker3: [00:10:10] Tests like this is

Speaker1: [00:10:11] Something I might have said in the past, or I had to work really

Speaker3: [00:10:16] Hard. I had to work really hard.

Speaker1: [00:10:17] And yes, Dartmouth is an Ivy League school, which is a huge accomplishment. But I never really talk about that. I downplay it like, oh, well, it was hard and I had to work hard.

Speaker3: [00:10:28] But you know what? I'm here today.

Speaker1: [00:10:30] So it's sort of downplaying how amazing it was to have that experience. Right. So think about something in your life, OK? Even if it's something not so great, like if you've gone through a divorce,

Speaker3: [00:10:43] For example, probably

Speaker1: [00:10:45] Not so great. And that's such a great experience.

Speaker3: [00:10:47] And you

Speaker1: [00:10:48] Downplay it and you say, well, I made it through, but that's an achievement even in and

Speaker3: [00:10:52] Of itself or think about business. The next time

Speaker1: [00:10:55] Someone asks you, how's that coaching business

Speaker3: [00:10:57] Going?

Speaker1: [00:10:58] I could say that I've created more than a half million dollars in my coaching business. I've helped hundreds of people, but before I say that, I would probably hesitate and this is something I'm really working on because I don't want to hesitate or think about health and wellbeing. When someone says, you look

Speaker3: [00:11:17] Great to me,

Speaker1: [00:11:18] I could say that. Hey, yeah. Over the past nine months, I've lost 27 pounds.

Speaker3: [00:11:22] But probably I

Speaker1: [00:11:23] Would just say thanks again. This is something that I'm working on. It happened last night. I met a

Speaker3: [00:11:30] Friend to walk

Speaker1: [00:11:31] Along the Monan, which is a trail in

Speaker3: [00:11:34] Indianapolis, and I had

Speaker1: [00:11:35] Not seen her in a while. And she said to me, You look

Speaker3: [00:11:38] Great when I walked up and I just

Speaker1: [00:11:40] Said, thanks. But then as we were parting ways an hour or two later, she said to me, you know, I really want to tell you, you really look great.

Speaker3: [00:11:47] And I then said,

Speaker1: [00:11:48] Yeah, well, since the last time I saw you, I've lost twenty seven

Speaker3: [00:11:51] Pounds. But I changed

Speaker1: [00:11:53] It on purpose because it was bothering me that I was just

Speaker3: [00:11:56] Downplaying it. So what is

Speaker1: [00:11:58] This thing for you that you're

Speaker3: [00:12:00] Downplaying? We can really

Speaker1: [00:12:02] Apply this kind of thinking to anything. It doesn't have to be a college or a business or health. It can be anything in your life that you've achieved and you're downplaying it.

Speaker3: [00:12:10] You're sort of

Speaker1: [00:12:11] Undermining your abilities

Speaker3: [00:12:12] Or your results. I think that

Speaker1: [00:12:14] This is a huge detriment not only to yourself, but also to

Speaker3: [00:12:19] Society. So, again,

Speaker1: [00:12:21] The paradox

Speaker3: [00:12:22] Of it

Speaker1: [00:12:23] Is that we all want to promote success and health and well-being and prosperity. Yet when someone has it, we're like,

Speaker3: [00:12:31] Hey, can you be quiet over there?

Speaker1: [00:12:32] Because there's a lot of people suffering in the world.

Speaker3: [00:12:35] Right? So just notice, if that is you if you're saying,

Speaker1: [00:12:39] Hey, can you just quiet down? I've seen too many great posts about how amazing you are.

Speaker3: [00:12:43] Well, that person.

Speaker1: [00:12:44] Good for them, right? Good for them. I should not be saying. Hey, can you just quiet down? And I've been working on that. So if someone posts something on social media or someone talks with you about their successes, what is your first reaction? What do you say? How do you feel in that moment? Are you so happy for them that they are bringing this prosperity and health and wealth and success into the world? Or do you go into a little bit of envy or jealousy? So it's not something that I want you to use to beat yourself up, but I just want you to be aware of it.

Speaker3: [00:13:19] And that's kind

Speaker1: [00:13:20] Of the first place to start the awareness. So recently I had this experience where I posted something online about my recent celebration of twenty five years of marriage. And that is like a

Speaker3: [00:13:31] Long time, people. It's a long time.

Speaker1: [00:13:33] And I received lots of congratulations and smiley faces and hearts. And I did receive a message

Speaker3: [00:13:39] About how

Speaker1: [00:13:41] A lot of people can't get to twenty five years and are suffering through being single parents and that sharing my happiness and my

Speaker3: [00:13:48] Success might be

Speaker1: [00:13:50] Something that I should consider thinking about. This also occurred when I shared a success in my business. I received a comment

Speaker3: [00:14:00] That not everybody

Speaker1: [00:14:01] Can find success as quote unquote air quotes here easily as I did. Kind of must be nice was their sentiment. But it's really not been that easy. It's been a lot of work. So I find it fascinating, this whole thing fascinating, because what these two examples in my own world showed me was that her way of

Speaker3: [00:14:24] Thinking about it is that

Speaker1: [00:14:25] Until there is no suffering in

Speaker3: [00:14:28] The world, we shouldn't

Speaker1: [00:14:29] Be bragging about our own successes. We shouldn't be proud

Speaker3: [00:14:33] That somehow my

Speaker1: [00:14:35] Success means that other

Speaker3: [00:14:37] People can't succeed.

Speaker1: [00:14:39] And of course, that's not true. In fact, the opposite is true. I believe that by bringing more successes and wealth and health into the world, that's an opportunity for other people to do that as well. I found it fascinating

Speaker3: [00:14:55] That a lot

Speaker1: [00:14:56] Of times we think incorrectly that because they're suffering, we shouldn't create the success or health or well-being or prosperity in the world. We shouldn't share that.

Speaker3: [00:15:07] And of course, the opposite is true. It's not more suffering that creates more suffering.

Speaker1: [00:15:14] It's the

Speaker3: [00:15:14] Health, the

Speaker1: [00:15:15] Well-being, the prosperity that is the cure for the suffering. Now, this does not

Speaker3: [00:15:21] Mean that I

Speaker1: [00:15:22] Want you to be arrogant or think from this place of better than that's not what

Speaker3: [00:15:28] I'm saying at all. There's a

Speaker1: [00:15:30] Balance that I

Speaker3: [00:15:31] Don't think we've really been

Speaker1: [00:15:32] Taught

Speaker3: [00:15:33] Before. So the balance,

Speaker1: [00:15:35] I

Speaker3: [00:15:35] Think, is thinking I'm amazing from a place of your

Speaker1: [00:15:39] Amazing two. We are both amazing. We are uniquely

Speaker3: [00:15:43] Amazing and we're sort of a mess and get it wrong

Speaker1: [00:15:47] And make mistakes along this path to amazing. Also, we've achieved so much.

Speaker3: [00:15:52] I have and you have.

Speaker1: [00:15:54] Let's brag about it a little. Let's talk about it. Let's talk about how amazing it is that I've done this and you've done that. And let's talk about how we've. Had failures along the way. That's what makes it real. But do you see how there's that balance there versus, oh, let's not talk about our successes or our achievements or yes, I did that, but it was

Speaker3: [00:16:17] Really hard or

Speaker1: [00:16:19] But this and this happened along the way. So, you know, it was rough sort of downplaying, trying to downplay our success. I think it's just a shame. I think it's not a shame for you because it feels bad to sort of downplay yourself. But really, societally, I think it's bad. It's just not helpful to downplay all

Speaker3: [00:16:40] Of this and some of the bad

Speaker1: [00:16:42] Feelings come along in creating

Speaker3: [00:16:45] The success, and that's

Speaker1: [00:16:46] Normal. So when you do this bragging, for example, from a place of love for yourself and others, you increase your connection, you want to give more. So the opposite would be doing it from a place of arrogance where you're thinking, oh, I did this. So I'm much better than this other person or this group of people that's decreasing connection.

Speaker3: [00:17:10] You sort of put

Speaker1: [00:17:11] Yourself on a pedestal,

Speaker3: [00:17:12] Which never ends well,

Speaker1: [00:17:13] Right? Being on a pedestal never ends well, because what happens when you're high up on a pedestal or on a stool,

Speaker3: [00:17:20] They get knocked down. So, of

Speaker1: [00:17:22] Course, we see that all the time with people who are arrogant. The difference isn't necessarily in what you're saying, it's how you're

Speaker3: [00:17:31] Saying it, meaning it's

Speaker1: [00:17:33] How you feel.

Speaker3: [00:17:34] So that's where the emotion that you feel

Speaker1: [00:17:37] When you're telling someone about your accomplishments comes into

Speaker3: [00:17:41] Play.

Speaker1: [00:17:41] Are you feeling proud of yourself and confident of yourself? It feels amazing to be proud of yourself and confident of yourself not falling into feeling

Speaker3: [00:17:50] Arrogant or that

Speaker1: [00:17:52] Extreme sense of pride where there's this hierarchy of I'm better than you that feels bad. And oftentimes I think

Speaker3: [00:18:00] People out there in the world

Speaker1: [00:18:02] Misinterpret our feeling of confidence as arrogance. And it's a fine line. So I always try to give people the benefit

Speaker3: [00:18:11] Of the doubt. If I find my

Speaker1: [00:18:12] Brain going to the place of, well, that's so arrogant. I try to change

Speaker3: [00:18:16] That and think, wow, isn't

Speaker1: [00:18:18] She confident? Because when you have the confidence in yourself and can see confidence in others, you do it from a place of connection. You actually feel really good. I think that this is why a lot of my clients say to me they want to become more confident. And that's something we work on a

Speaker3: [00:18:39] Lot in one on one

Speaker1: [00:18:41] Coaching in the committed to growth group coaching program and level up my other group coaching. Of course, with this confidence, then you continue to do the thing you were doing and you create more success. Without that

Speaker3: [00:18:55] Confidence, there is no

Speaker1: [00:18:57] Chance that you will have more success. So think about the results that you have in your life. It can be in any area.

Speaker3: [00:19:04] Typically we want

Speaker1: [00:19:05] To talk about health or wealth. So let's say it can be with your weight in your body and your exercising and your physical well-being. It can be with relationships. So your marriage, your kids or your

Speaker3: [00:19:18] Family, it can

Speaker1: [00:19:19] Be with money or career or your business. Those are some of the main areas where we create results. And think about the results that you've created. What is the best way you can tell that story?

Speaker3: [00:19:32] So, for example, if you

Speaker1: [00:19:34] Made one hundred thousand dollars in your business last year, how do you tell that story? Do you tell the story

Speaker3: [00:19:40] Of, well, that's

Speaker1: [00:19:41] Not enough, I want to make more. I'm not good enough. I should have made more things just aren't working. I don't know what I'm doing. Why didn't I get to one hundred and one?

Speaker3: [00:19:50] I don't know how to make more. That's one story.

Speaker1: [00:19:53] Or you can

Speaker3: [00:19:54] Tell the story of I

Speaker1: [00:19:56] Made one hundred thousand dollars in two years before that

Speaker3: [00:19:59] I didn't know how to make anything and I created

Speaker1: [00:20:01] Money by providing value to the world. I helped ten clients create value in their world or I helped them create results in their weight loss journey. And through providing that value, I created one hundred thousand dollars of value that I never knew how to do before I became such a different person. Through the

Speaker3: [00:20:22] Process, I became

Speaker1: [00:20:24] An amazing coach if you're a coach. So go back to that episode where we talk about pricing and how your belief in yourself,

Speaker3: [00:20:34] Ok,

Speaker1: [00:20:35] Plays a role in

Speaker3: [00:20:37] Creating your

Speaker1: [00:20:38] Price, your belief in yourself, your belief in your client. So you're believing that they can see you as competent and not arrogant in your belief in your offer to help them. This all plays a role in this exactly what we're talking about today. So that's the difference in growing and wanting from a place of lack versus growing and wanting from a place of abundance. And when you want. Imlach, when you think losing ten pounds isn't enough or when you think making one hundred isn't enough, when you think that your current result isn't enough, you actually create more, not enough ness.

Speaker3: [00:21:16] And it feels

Speaker1: [00:21:17] Really bad versus creating success.

Speaker3: [00:21:20] So what happens is you're going

Speaker1: [00:21:22] Around

Speaker3: [00:21:22] Thinking this isn't enough.

Speaker1: [00:21:24] I'm not doing it right. This is so hard. I can't do this. It feels bad because those thoughts are creating emotions

Speaker3: [00:21:31] That feel really stuck

Speaker1: [00:21:33] And you end up self sabotaging. So the action you take will be

Speaker3: [00:21:37] Quitting, taking a

Speaker1: [00:21:39] Break, slowing

Speaker3: [00:21:40] Down. So you prove

Speaker1: [00:21:42] Ultimately that those thoughts of this is so hard. I can't do this are true. You make it true that you're not good enough because you quit.

Speaker3: [00:21:51] Of course, it's not

Speaker1: [00:21:52] True that it wasn't enough. That was just a story you are telling yourself now. Conversely, if you are telling yourself the story of how amazing it was to lose the weight or to create the 100K, and you say that this is an amazing start to a lifelong journey.

Speaker3: [00:22:09] For example,

Speaker1: [00:22:10] If your business you want to make 200 K, you just say, OK, now let's double that hundred K, that's energy

Speaker3: [00:22:16] That

Speaker1: [00:22:16] Wanting from a place of abundance and wholeness drives you way more, so much better because you feel better

Speaker3: [00:22:25] Along the way. You're having fun with it.

Speaker1: [00:22:27] So you keep going and you figure it out.

Speaker3: [00:22:30] Right.

Speaker1: [00:22:31] It kind of goes back to passion eating right. Which is having the process of following your passion. What you really want is feeling great along the way so you can absolutely create

Speaker3: [00:22:45] Or want

Speaker1: [00:22:46] To increase and improve your results from a place of feeling really

Speaker3: [00:22:50] Good. Doing it from a

Speaker1: [00:22:52] Place of feeling really bad doesn't work from a place of being so proud of

Speaker3: [00:22:56] Yourself. You're amazing. You have done so many

Speaker1: [00:22:59] Amazing things in

Speaker3: [00:23:00] Your life that works.

Speaker1: [00:23:01] And even if you don't have the sort of like big end result that you want in a particular

Speaker3: [00:23:06] Area, if you wanted

Speaker1: [00:23:08] To lose 50 pounds and you've lost

Speaker3: [00:23:09] 30, you don't

Speaker1: [00:23:10] Have the fifty pound result

Speaker3: [00:23:12] Yet,

Speaker1: [00:23:13] But you do still have the amazing result of 30. You still have done so many amazing things to get there with respect to food and wellness in your body, in health. This is something that I really had to channel as I was losing weight over the past year and I was working on a revenue goal in my business. I had to be proud of the process and proud of where I was

Speaker3: [00:23:35] Along the way. So I want to encourage you

Speaker1: [00:23:37] To find those amazing things. Even if they're really small, you get eight hours of sleep a night, you go to bed at nine o'clock, you drink water every day, you move your body, whatever it is. Those are small, amazing results. Look at the results that you have.

Speaker3: [00:23:52] Intel, the most

Speaker1: [00:23:53] Amazing story about them to yourself.

Speaker3: [00:23:56] This is different, my friends,

Speaker1: [00:23:58] From feeling grateful. I wanted to point that out. This is celebrating the abundance along the way.

Speaker3: [00:24:04] And it doesn't

Speaker1: [00:24:04] Mean that you have to go around telling everyone.

Speaker3: [00:24:06] But certainly I don't want you to

Speaker1: [00:24:08] Feel that you shouldn't tell everyone, because, again, like I said at the beginning, I do think that we're sort of, generally speaking, taught to not boast or share success in what a shame that is, because it's not like if you are successful,

Speaker3: [00:24:23] I can't

Speaker1: [00:24:24] Be

Speaker3: [00:24:24] Successful or if you lose weight, I can't lose

Speaker1: [00:24:27] Weight. If you build a business, I can't build a business. That's not true. The opposite of true. If you're successful and I see and I feel a confidence in your success, you show me what's

Speaker3: [00:24:38] Possible as long as

Speaker1: [00:24:40] I am open to it. So you being proud of yourself shows other people that it's possible for them if they're not ready

Speaker3: [00:24:47] For that, if they don't like that, that's OK. That's their journey.

Speaker1: [00:24:51] It's totally fine.

Speaker3: [00:24:52] It doesn't mean that you need

Speaker1: [00:24:54] To feel bad about yourself or downplay or hide your accomplishments at all.

Speaker3: [00:24:58] If you do that, you show

Speaker1: [00:25:00] Up small

Speaker3: [00:25:01] And you

Speaker1: [00:25:02] Miss out on your own greatness. You miss out on helping more people. Now, this does take some courage because the more sort of success in any area you have, whether it's relationships or business or health or marriage or money, the more success you have, I think the more polar opposites

Speaker3: [00:25:20] Or the more

Speaker1: [00:25:21] Polarity that presents

Speaker3: [00:25:23] Itself publicly. And even if it's not public

Speaker1: [00:25:26] Necessarily in a way of having like a social media platform or an online business like

Speaker3: [00:25:31] I have, it could

Speaker1: [00:25:32] Be publicly within your peer

Speaker3: [00:25:33] Group, OK,

Speaker1: [00:25:34] With other women, with other moms, with other coaches. Whatever your group is, there can be some popularity. Like people get a little bit uncomfortable when someone super successful.

Speaker3: [00:25:46] That's because those other

Speaker1: [00:25:48] People, they're having a

Speaker3: [00:25:49] Story about

Speaker1: [00:25:51] Success and it actually has nothing to do with your actual success. So if we go back to the example where the person wrote that I needed to be a little more a. Or humble that other people may not have seen the success or they may be suffering in some way, I can go back and see that ten times, a hundred times that comment, that number of people thought it was great and it was inspiring that I was

Speaker3: [00:26:18] Sharing that, you know, thank you for

Speaker1: [00:26:19] Sharing.

Speaker3: [00:26:20] It gives me hope.

Speaker1: [00:26:21] So exact same circumstance, exact same caption. Totally different interpretation. Based on what? Based on that

Speaker3: [00:26:30] Person's story, not mine.

Speaker1: [00:26:32] So I don't want you to miss out on helping people or hiding your own greatness in accomplishments and downplaying your successes because of the one person who might not like it.

Speaker3: [00:26:42] Just one

Speaker1: [00:26:43] That's totally OK

Speaker3: [00:26:44] If they don't like it. Think about the

Speaker1: [00:26:45] Results you have in your life.

Speaker3: [00:26:47] Think about how you think about them. Are they not

Speaker1: [00:26:50] Enough? Do you downplay them? Do you hide them or are you proud of them? Are you so proud no matter what they are, no matter where you are in the journey? And typically the story I hear with whatever results at whatever level you're at, typically I hear you guys think it's not enough. So if you've lost ten pounds and the goal is

Speaker3: [00:27:10] 50, you're not at 50

Speaker1: [00:27:12] Yet. You've tried everything. It's not going to work. What I want to say is that is amazing. You tried so many methods. You're learning so much about what

Speaker3: [00:27:21] Works for you and you've already

Speaker1: [00:27:23] Lost some weight. Right. A very short time ago, you were heavier.

Speaker3: [00:27:26] You know what that tells me?

Speaker1: [00:27:27] Listening to your

Speaker3: [00:27:28] Story, it's possible for me to lose weight. Is it hard? Yes, but you've

Speaker1: [00:27:33] Done it so far.

Speaker3: [00:27:34] I can do it.

Speaker1: [00:27:35] I'm so excited about that. I want to tell you that I'm excited about your story. So tell the world about your accomplishments. Tell them what's going on for you.

Speaker3: [00:27:44] Just notice notice

Speaker1: [00:27:46] In conversations how tempting it is to connect over our problems and our suffering. OK, so here is the coach with me.

Speaker3: [00:27:54] How can you

Speaker1: [00:27:55] Flip the

Speaker3: [00:27:55] Conversation and want to

Speaker1: [00:27:57] Hear about people's wins and accomplishments and

Speaker3: [00:28:00] Successes from a place

Speaker1: [00:28:01] Of love and connection? What would it take to practice this? Tell me about your most recent accomplishment. This is a place for you to practice. Write to me. Tell me about your wins. I want to hear I want to hear how proud you are. I want you to tell me about all of your accomplishments. So when that voice in your head says, I'm so proud of myself,

Speaker3: [00:28:25] I did this, I'm so

Speaker1: [00:28:27] Proud of

Speaker3: [00:28:27] You that you

Speaker1: [00:28:29] Did that. What are you thinking about? What are you proud of? And isn't it amazing? We all are amazing. So connect with me, message me, email

Speaker3: [00:28:38] Me, send me a voice

Speaker1: [00:28:40] Memo, connect and share with me what your win of the week is. What is your win of the week?

Speaker3: [00:28:46] Share it with me and share it with someone else.

Speaker1: [00:28:49] This is practice sharing the wins and this is not from a hypothetical place. I want you to get real with this. Other people may not think you're amazing no matter what

Speaker3: [00:29:02] You do, whether you put

Speaker1: [00:29:03] Yourself down or raise yourself up. And this isn't about putting people in a hierarchy. Everybody is

Speaker3: [00:29:09] Unique. Right.

Speaker1: [00:29:11] And everybody is half amazing and half a mess. So let's amplify

Speaker3: [00:29:16] The amazing part just as often

Speaker1: [00:29:19] As we amplify the

Speaker3: [00:29:20] Mess.

Speaker1: [00:29:21] Let's be proud of ourselves. Let's give ourselves permission to feel

Speaker3: [00:29:25] Confident and to feel good

Speaker1: [00:29:26] And to brag about it

Speaker3: [00:29:28] A little bit.

Speaker1: [00:29:29] So if you loved this podcast, you are going to love coaching. And I want to ask you, who is your coach? Because I would be honored to be your coach because it is through coaching, working directly with you that we can take

Speaker3: [00:29:44] Everything in this podcast to the next level.

Speaker1: [00:29:48] And I invite you to

Speaker3: [00:29:49] Join my amazing

Speaker1: [00:29:51] Community of women and deepen your own personal development. Head on over to my Web site to learn more about all of the different ways in which I coach women. We have options.

Speaker3: [00:30:06] We've got Deep

Speaker1: [00:30:06] Dove VIP days, one on one coaching group, coaching team coaching. I bet one might be a fit for you. And if it's time if this resonated, if it's time for you to feel proud of what you're doing and to use that as fuel to create more

Speaker3: [00:30:22] Success, you

Speaker1: [00:30:24] Are ready for coaching. And I invite you and I would be honored to be your coach. OK, my friends, that's what I have for you today. Go tell someone how amazing you are and then hit them back with how amazing they are. I look forward to hearing from you. Have a great rest of your week. And remember, there's never a better time to level up and see you next week. Thanks for tuning in to today's show.

Speaker2: [00:30:51] If you're ready to commit to personal and professional growth, move forward, make money and manage life. Head to Andrea Libros Dotcom. That's a NDR. L i e b r o s s dotcom to find out about the ways we can work together until next time go level.