135: Where Do You Need More Freedom In Your Life or Business?

Welcome to the Time to Level Up Podcast. I'm your host, Andrea Liebross. Each week, I focus on the systems, strategy, and big thinking you need to CEO your business and life to the next level. Are you ready? Let's go.

Hello, my friends, and welcome back to the podcast. How is your summer going? Are you getting enough sunshine? Are you spending enough time with your family? Are you still generating revenue in your business? Do you feel like you're always burnt out because you're running in 20 different directions? Or do you feel like you have enough energy for everything?

Well, when I'm recording this, I know you're listening to this a little bit later but I'm recording this at the beginning of June and I'm going to be honest, I think my summer is just about to start because both of my kids have been home living in our apartment here, that's been close quarters, for the last three or four weeks but they're both about to head off for their summer jobs in different states.

I am thrilled that they are going out on their own adventures and will not be here at the summer. I think it's super healthy for them. But I gotta be honest, I think my summer will start with a leap. Today, what I want to talk about is what you need more of.

I originally thought I would title this episode “Where Do You Need More Freedom?” because my mastermind is called Runway to Freedom and my freedom finders in there are really entrepreneurial women who want a business and a life that work well together, where they have the freedom that they want as an entrepreneur.

A lot of entrepreneurs get into this because they feel like they're going to have more flexibility. But as they grow, they find out that maybe that's just not the case. When I think about freedom, and what we're all searching for, I think these freedoms are really related to time, money, brain power, and relationships. Freedom of relationships, who you spend your time with.

Honestly, no one wants to have obligations, the word obligation in and of itself, I didn't Google it, which is unlike me, but I think it has some sort of connotation that's not necessarily a positive one. We want to be free of obligations. We don't have to be at a certain place at a certain time. We want to feel free and how we choose our time. We want to be free of debt. We want to have plenty of money and feel freedom in how we choose to spend it.

We want to only think about what we want to think about. Most of the time, we want to think about what we want to think about is meaningful. We want to feel free to choose how we use those brain cells that we have. We want to spend time with people who we love and love us in return, people who enrich our lives, people that help us become a better version of ourselves. We want to feel free to choose who we are with.

Really, what this comes down to is, what do we want? What we want are all of these freedoms. What I see on my consult calls is that most of my women get on that call wanting one of those few things. They want more money. They want more time. They want more brain power. They don't want to feel like they're just putting out fires all the time. They want to be using their brain power and energy for other things, including their family.

They want people in their world who support them, who help them grow, who make them a better person, whether that's a teammate or a family member. Does that sound like you? Do you want one of those things? I'm going to guess you are if you're someone that's listening to this podcast.

Now recently, I came across an article in Medium. Have you ever read Medium? It's an online compilation of blogs. The title of the article was What Do You Want? The author had done an informal survey of about 50 people and what he found was that what people want really aligns with one of these four freedoms.

But what was most interesting to me in the article was that whether we talk about where do you want more freedom or what do you want, all of the answers given generally lead to how do you want to feel. Everybody wanted to feel happy, to feel valued, to feel calm, and to feel loved. Think about that. Think about how having those freedoms of time, money, brainpower, and relationships, really, what that comes down to is you wanting to feel happy, valued, calm, and loved.

The real question then is not where do we need more freedom, it's not what do we want, it's how do we want to feel and how do we get that feeling. Let's dive into these four areas and explore what comes up when we go searching for more money, for example.

Why do we want more money? Well, maybe we want to invest more in ourselves or in our business. We want to spend more on our own personal care, on a coach, on a marketing system, or on new software, we want to invest. We want to use our money to support ourselves and others, and we want money to create enjoyment.

Regardless of whether or not you think why you or someone else wants more money, what we really want when it comes to money is that we want more money because we believe when we have more money, we will feel a lot different. More money might allow us to escape from anxiety around not having enough money in our business or our personal lives. We will then feel more calm and at ease.

Is this you? We do a lot of work inside my coaching programs on figuring out how to create these feelings regardless of what the number in your bank account is. Now, I am all for creating more money. Don't get me wrong. But notice how what it really comes down to is a way in which you want to feel and I think a great way to determine what we want to feel is to ask the seven whys.

If you've never done this ask-the-seven-whys game, we're going to do it now. I want you to just listen. I'm going to roleplay what some women give as answers and I want you to see is this me or what would you be saying if you were doing these seven whys and how are you going to get what you want to feel in the end. That's where coaching comes in. It plays a huge role in figuring out how to get that.

When we do a VIP day, we go through the seven whys in a sense as we create a business plan, because we've got to know why we're putting things on the plan. But let's dive in here to money. Why do we want more money? Someone might say, “Well, I want more money to invest in my business.” Why do you want to invest in your business? “So that I can make things easier?”

Why do you want to make things easier? “So I can serve more people?” Why do you want to serve more people? “So that I can make a greater impact on the world?” Why do you want to make a greater impact on the world? “So that I can leave a legacy?” Why do you want to leave a legacy? “So I can feel happier and I can feel valued.” There were seven ones. In the end, we got to why do we want more money? So I can feel happier and valued. Super interesting.

Now, if we look at the money question, not as it relates to our business, but as it relates to us potentially in a personal sense, I do the seven whys, so why do you want more money? So I can take more vacations? Why do you want to take more vacations? So I can have more family time. Why do you want more family time? Because when I have more family time, I'll feel more connected.

Why do you want to feel more connected? To show how much I love my kids and my spouse regardless of where I am or how much time I spend with them. Why is that important that they know that you love them lots and lots? Because I want them to love me back. Why do you want them to love you back? Because love is really a fuel for me. Why is it a fuel for you? Well, when I feel loved, I'm a better person. I'm happier. Isn't that true when we feel loved? We are a different, better version of ourselves. Those seven whys really dig down on two reasons why we might want more money.

Now, you can feel loved, you can feel happier, you can feel valued right now today by generating some new thoughts versus trying to generate more money. Now I do want you to go generate more money but what I'm trying to prove here is it really is helpful to figure out why you want more money, and then you can fast-track your way to getting it if you know the ultimate reason why.

Alright, let's look at time. People want a sense of freedom or at least they want to have some ownership over their time and lives. But time is always in short supply. Life is overwhelming, the chores keep coming, the demands of work, family, and life are really resentless.

I think a lot of times, couples even fight over that they don't have enough me time. They don't have enough time to care for themselves and they get in an argument with their spouse because they want the spouse to take over handling the kids. But I think one thing that the pandemic forced us to do is to see the world and see our lives from a different perspective, from a perspective of having more time and how that can make things different.

But for those of us who have returned to normal, which I think is most, post-pandemic life, we're back to running ragged again. You would have thought we would have learned but we still want more time. Let's do the seven whys with this one.

Okay, my friend, why do you want more time? So I can get everything done I want to get done. Why do you want to get everything done? So I will feel in control. Why do you want to feel in control? Because then I can really spend time on what I want to spend time on. Why do you want to spend time on what you want to spend time on? Because that I think is really where the growth is. If I could just have more time to brainstorm and plan things, then I think we would grow.

Why do you want to grow? Because I'll feel more accomplished. Why do you want to feel more accomplished? Because I'll add more to the world. Why do you want to add more to the world? Because I want to feel more valued. You see how even that got down to wanting to feel more valued. Your desire for more time is so that you can accomplish more which then you believe will make you feel more valued.

You can feel more valued right now today. Valued or to make a contribution, this is mainly related to people's work. No one wants to feel that they're on a hamster wheel. Everybody wants to feel like they're making a worthy contribution. Younger people particularly want to feel their efforts have meaning. They want to hook them to the greater good. But most of us, we’re just doing our best to keep up with what we've got in front of us. But feeling useful or valued is a fundamental human desire.

If you have people working for you, it's worth remembering this. People who feel valued feel better. They do better. They have fewer sick days. Interesting, huh? As we're exploring this, really what it comes down to is a way you want to feel. This is why I think it's so valuable to have coaching around both business and life together.

I had a client the other day say, “I really just want to focus on my business. I don't know if I really want to talk about all this life stuff.” I can understand that. But why? “Well, I just want my business to grow.” Why do you want your business to grow? We got into that. Really what it comes down to is that she wants to feel a different way and she needs to figure out how to manage her mind, which some might say is more life-related. If she can do that, her business is going to grow. This is why I think having both business and life coaching together is the best.

Let's go back to the seven whys and let's go back to time. Here's another example. I'm not going to go all the way through this one, but I think you're going to get my gist on this. This is a personal relationship with time. Why do you want more time? Well, I want more time so I can spend more time with my kids, my business, my spouse, and all the things.

Why do you want to spend more time with kids, business, spouse, all the things? Because I'm tired of feeling so torn? Why are you tired of feeling so torn? Because I just never know what to focus on. Why do you never know what to focus on? I guess because I never take the time to figure out what to focus on or how to manage my schedule.

Why do you never take the time to focus on how to manage your schedule? Because I always feel like there's never enough time. Why do you feel like there's never enough time? Because my mind is never quiet and calm. What this person is really going after is wanting a calm and quiet mind.

I'm going to admit when I say to people what do you want as an entrepreneurial woman especially, right up there with happiness is the calm, quiet mind. I really think that we all want more peace. It's probably because this is fundamental to any shot that we have of being happy. It is hard to enjoy anything when your mind is full of intrusive, racing, chaotic thoughts and dead churns in your stomach.

The world is full of things that can worry us, wind us up, and make us go crazy. Aiming for a calm, quiet mind for peace is definitely a worthy goal. Notice, again, what this really comes down to is a feeling. Why do we want more time? Because we want a quiet, calm mind.

Newsflash, you can, again, feel these things right now. You can take actions right now. You can change thoughts right now. It's just a matter of managing your mind to be happy. That's one of our ultimate goals to be happy. Humans are hardwired to give this answer. It always comes up at the top of the list. It's one of the things my clients give most often. It's what you'd likely get if you walk down the street with a microphone asking random people, “What do you want more of?” They might say, “Happiness.”

But if that's the question, I want you to ask yourself, we'll go a little deeper, what does happiness mean to you? Because to get up every morning in the pursuit of happiness is a pretty big ask. If you can identify one thought that leads you to feeling happy, that creates an action where the result is a feeling of happiness, and you do that just one thing that's going to bring your day alive, you're probably in for a good day. Interesting.

I'm going to tell you a little story before I close this out. We talk a lot about how your thoughts generate feelings which turn your actions. In Runway to Freedom, as my entrepreneurial women are working towards creating amazing businesses, lives that feel like they flow, are easy, and they love, we talk about the mindset and systems they need to do that.

I was on a call the other day with one of my Runway to Freedom students. I got down to the beginning of the call and I said, “What do you want to accomplish in this call?” She said, “Well, I really want to help you to help me figure out what I need to do first, second, and third in my business because I never have enough time.”

I walked her through what I called the time categories. You spend time on administrative tasks. You spend time on creating content. You spend time on delivering to clients. You spend time giving your kids a bath. You spend time with your spouse. We went through all of those things.

Right off the bat, we determined a few things that she could outsource. She could send out the laundry, she could find a chef, and she could find someone to finally organize her linen closet and cabinets at home. They moved into this house about a year ago and she said, “I still feel like I don't have any systems there.” She could outsource someone organizing her showroom after she's gone through a day of putting things together and made a mess so to speak. She could outsource someone to do more of her invoicing.

Right then and there, she's going to create more time. We talked about how she would fit all the rest of the things into her ideal week. This ideal week exercise is so important. DM me “ideal week” if you want more information on that. It's such a good exercise and that's really how you put all the pieces together of how to get more time.

We didn't decide that exercise was important to her, she already knew that, but we decided that in order to continue to give it importance, it needed to be done first thing in the morning. At this point in the conversation, which were a good, I don't know, 30-40 minutes into it, she finally told me that she was getting very, very little sleep.

Exercise in the morning was going to be really hard because she was getting little sleep and that little sleep was really probably what was leading to her frazzle around time, money, and brainpower. It was definitely putting a strain on her relationship with her husband. Because she was feeling like he should be the one to get up with the kids in the middle of the night.

Her kids keep coming into her room in the middle of the night, then she ends up walking them back and they come back again, and then she just ends up sleeping in their room on the floor, which isn't good for anyone. It's putting a strain on a relationship because she's getting annoyed and frustrated. She thinks her husband should be helping out more with this.

To backtrack, the conversation started around, “Hey, help me figure out what to do first, second, and third in my business to get the growth I want,” and ended up with us having a discussion about how she had to change her thoughts around her kids sleeping to get the feeling of calm, cool, and collected in her business. But we circuitously went through the seven whys in order to get there.

She needs to figure out how to better deal with them getting up three times each night and she's probably going to buckle up, I'll call it, and get them to stay in their rooms. She has to put up probably a thicker skin on when they keep coming back. She's coming back to her room, she's got to bring them back to their room without talking to them.

She might have to do that three or four times and she might have to do that for a whole week. It's going to be really hard and she's still probably not going to get enough sleep. But in the end, the reward is going to pay off. She can't have the thought that her husband should be helping because he's not. That's not serving her. She's got to change her thoughts around that too.

Notice our discussion about how to figure out how to grow a business came down to how to get her kids to sleep and stop worrying about why her husband isn't helping. My friends, this is the work we do inside coaching. This is the work that is worth doing. This is the work that leads to happiness, love, joy, and feeling calm, cool, collected, and valued. I think this is work that everybody should be doing.

How do you do this work? Well, it's a journey. If you have a Sherpa or a guide with you, it makes it a whole lot easier. The first step in getting that Sherpa or guide, I would love to be that Sherpa or guide if you don't already have one, you might have one but if you don't, go book a call, go book a strategy call. It's free.

I guarantee you that call is worth $10,000 in and of itself because you're going to leave with much more clarity, like my client did, on what really needs to be addressed, what's really going to make the difference, how you're going to get more freedom, time, money, energy, how you're going to get what you want and how you're going to get what you want to feel.

Head to the shownotes to book a call, DM me, or just go to andreaslinks.com. There you're going to find a link to book a call as well. If you know someone who's struggling like this, who wants more time, freedom, money, different people in their lives, share this episode with them. Just click that little square with the arrow on your app right now and share it with them. That's being a great friend and I'm all about being a great friend.

Alright, my friends, until next week. Remember, now is the best time to level up. There is no better time. It doesn't matter that it's the middle of summer, we could make an argument that it is the best time right now. Let me know how it's going. I can't wait to hear about your successes. See you next week.

Hey, listening to podcasts is great. But you also have to do something to kick your business up a notch. You need to take some action, right? So go to andreaslinks.com and take the quiz. I guarantee you'll walk away knowing exactly what your next best step is to level up.