225: Interested to Invested: What to Say When a Lead Ghosts You

Welcome to the She Thinks Big! Podcast. Get ready to level up your thinking and expand your horizons. I’m your host, Andrea Liebross, your guide on this journey of big ideas and bold moves. I am the best-selling author of She Thinks Big: The Entrepreneurial Woman's Guide to Moving Past the Messy Middle and Into the Extraordinary.

I support women like you with the insights and mindset you need to think bigger and the strategies and systems you need to turn that thinking into action and make it all a reality. Are you ready to stop thinking small and start thinking big? Let’s dive in.

Hello, friends. Welcome back to the She Thinks Big podcast. You are in for the second episode of a three-part series—our special series, Interested to Invested.

If you haven’t listened to the previous episode of the She Thinks Big podcast, which is really Episode 224—but it's Episode 1 in this three-part series—hit pause and go back to that one. That episode lays the groundwork for everything we’re talking about today.

Before I dive in, I want you to check in with yourself. How are you today? One of the things I always ask my coaching clients when we begin is, “What are you celebrating?” Sometimes I ask them, “How are you feeling today? Where are you today?” So I want you to check in with yourself on that front, and I want you to go back and listen to Episode 1 if you haven’t done that yet: Episode 224/Episode 1 of this three-part series. And then let me ask you, if you did listen to Episode 1, did you do your homework?

Now, in coaching, no one gets grades. No one’s getting a grade on how well they participate in the podcast either. But doing the homework is doing the work worth doing.

It is taking the massive action that I sometimes distinguish from passive action. So I had asked you to think of two or three leads who’ve gone quiet and write down the last thing you said to them.

Now, don’t worry if you didn’t, just pause right now. Take five minutes to do that. Who are the last two or three leads who’ve gone quiet, and what was the last thing you said to them? Because today, we’re going to use that information to craft some powerful follow-up messages.

Today is all about what to say when someone ghosts you. Here’s where we’re headed. I’m going to share with you, you’ll learn my signature BIG follow-up method. Then I’m going to walk you through exactly what to say on that very first follow-up you have, which might be day two or three, a week later follow-up, two weeks later, etc.

Most importantly, we’re going to talk about how to label your leads clearly so you stop wasting energy on the wrong ones. Because you and I both know, we’ve done this before, we’ve wasted energy on leads that you’re not loving even from the get-go.

So let’s just start there. Let’s start with labels. The very first follow-up, whether you send it on day one, day two, or day three (no later than day three), is actually a diagnostic tool. This is where you can determine: when you do that follow-up, that very first initial follow-up conversation, you can determine in this conversation, are they a closed “yes,” and they are ready to move forward, yes, they’re in.

They could be a closed no, they’re clearly not interested and are a true no. Or they are a closed no, not yet, they’re not ready right now but they might be later.

Now, an important note, if someone is a closed no, not a good fit, you should have identified that in the initial conversation. That’s not a follow-up issue. That’s a clarity-in-the-call issue.

Just like they’re trying to determine whether or not they want to work with you or purchase from you in that initial conversation, you’re trying to determine the same thing. “Do I want to work with them or have them be a customer or a client?”

If they’re not a clear yes or no after your first conversation and they are a good fit, then they’re going to move on to follow-up one, if they're not a clear yes or no after follow-up one, if they ghost you entirely, that's when we give them the label closed ghost.

Here are the labels again. It is “closed,” not a good fit, that you should be able to determine right off the bat. If we can't determine that and they don't tell you immediately close no, then we move on to the first follow-up. Through that follow-up, we determine if they're a closed yes, a closed no, or a closed no, not yet.

But if we don't even get to that place, they miss the call, they don't respond, then it's a closed ghost. That's who this episode is really for, for the people out there who receive the closed ghosts.

Now that we've labeled your leads, let's talk about what you're actually going to say because what you say matters, how you say it matters. The BIG follow-up method is how we shift from feeling awkward or ghosted to confidently guiding someone forward.

This is the method I teach my clients because it really does work. It brings structure to what can feel like a messy or an emotional process, and it lets you show up like a CEO, like a business owner or founder or someone in charge, not like someone who's chasing down clients.

The BIG follow-up method stands for B: bold intention, I: informed interest, and G: genuine guidance. Together, these three elements position you as the leader in the sales conversation, the guide, not the pest, not the desperate one, the professional who really brings some clarity.

So let's break them down.

B: bold interaction. This is where confidence meets clarity. Bold doesn't mean aggressive, it means certain. It means you're showing up like someone who believes in what they're offering and knows how to help.

Most people send follow-ups with language like, "Just checking in," "Hope I'm not bothering you." That immediately puts you in a lower position. But bold interaction flips the script. Instead of waiting passively, you lead.

Here's an example: "I'm following up as promised to help you move forward." That doesn't mean they're going to say yes to you, but we're just moving the conversation forward.

I recently coached a photographer who was terrified of bothering her leads. When she shifted this approach, she booked three weddings in one week from prospects who had previously gone silent. That difference is palpable. Bold interaction.

All right, that brings us to I: informed interest. So let's make this personal. Your prospect is not just another name on a list. They are a human who told you something meaningful. So bring that back into the conversation. This shows that you are listening, that you care, that they're not just another number or line in your CRM.

It's the opposite of kind of the spray-and-pray type of follow-up method, all right? So here's an example of what you could say: "When we talked, you mentioned wanting to hire a team member by next month. I thought of you when I came across this article about onboarding."

See how that response shows that you were listening and you're providing additional value? All right, so that's what I stands for: informed interest.

G: genuine guidance. Genuine guidance. So this is your opportunity to be of service, not to sell, but to serve.

What would actually help them take the next step? The key is really to provide direction without pressure. You're not begging for a decision, you're simply opening the door and showing them the way through. You're saying, "I've got you. Here's what's next."

So an example might be, like we have suggested that you do at the end of your very first call, "I've got Tuesday or Thursday open at 10:00 AM. Which one works better for you?" Okay?

So you're guiding them to that next conversation, to making a decision, even if the decision is no, that is better than not knowing at all.

All right, so let's talk about timing, to talk about kind of the mindset you need to be in and the manner in which you're going to go about this. Now let's talk about timing. Timing isn't just a logistical detail, it's kind of a signal. A signal that you're thoughtful, strategic, and really kind of reliable, they can trust you.

So here is the truth: studies show that 80% of sales require at least five follow-up attempts. Doesn't that seem like a lot?

But 44% of people—owners—give up after just one attempt. Okay, let's not have you be one of those people. And I think the ideal follow-up timeline is within three days of your initial conversation, you have another conversation with them where you're trying to decide if they're a closed yes, a closed no, a closed no, not yet, and hopefully they're not getting the ghost label at that point.

But in that conversation, you do some sort of value add. You remind them of the conversation, you remind them of what they've been looking for, and you add some relevant resource to it. You can even be, most of my clients find that after doing this for three weeks, blah, blah, blah changes. That's a relevant resource just in and of itself.

Okay, then if they still don't know, you share an insight at about day seven. You add some sort of personal touch that shows you're thinking of their specific situation. This could be, "Hey, I know you were going away this weekend, I hope you had a great time." That's it. Or, "I know that you've been thinking about expanding and offering another product. I just saw someone do the same thing, or I just ran across this, which might be helpful in making a decision." So day seven is like sharing an insight.

Day 14, you could use the nine-word email follow-up, which is clean and compelling and kind of a re-engagement strategy. You really have to tailor these though. If they've already been a no, you're probably not going to use this day 14 thing. If they're, “I can't decide yet,” then you would do this nine-word follow-up email. And I'll give you some examples of those in a bit.

Then at day 30, if they are still ghosting you or are dragging it out, you got to close the loop. You've got to gracefully offer closure while leaving the door open, potentially for some time in the future. But ideally, let's review, by day three, you've uncovered whether someone's a closed yes, a closed no, or a closed no, not yet.

But if you've reached day three and they've ghosted you, there's no response at all, or they've missed the follow-up call you set out to have, that's where they earn the label closed ghost. That's not a bad thing. It gives you direction.

Here's an idea of what to say in that very first follow-up, day two or three. “Hi, Susie Q, Polly Prospect. I was thinking about our conversation and you mentioned wanting to XYZ goal. I found a resource that might help you do that and I wanted to chat about it with you further.”

Now, you could bring that resource to the table if they’re actually showing up on day three when you’ve had set your initial follow-up call. If they do not show up on day three, they ghost you on day three, I would say, “Just circling back to our conversation that we had about meeting today, hope you're okay. You mentioned wanting to XYZ goal, here's a resource that may help. I am happy to chat further about it. How does Tuesday at 2:00 or Thursday at 4:00 look for you?”

Okay, so that might be in a text or in an email or in a voice conversation, whichever method that you have originally started to communicate with them through, I would keep that method. I get that question a lot. Keep the method that works for them. If you're willing to do that, if not, then just follow what you do, the same thing for everybody.

All right, so still no. Pretend there's no nothing, you hear nothing, crickets. Day seven, now we have to be insightful. This is called the insightful share. "Hey, I was thinking about our conversation and remembered how important blah, blah, blah is to you. Here's something I've seen work well." And start the insight.

Let me know, or I think it'd even be better, I wouldn't do the let me know. I would take that out. No "let me knows," "If you are wanting to explore how that could work with your situation, I have time to chat on Wednesday at 1:00 or Friday at 10:00." So day seven is an insight share.

Then if they're still ghosting, let's go back and they're on day 14 and do this nine-word follow-up email. "Hi Polly Prospect, are you still looking for support with XYZ challenge or goal?" That's it. "Hi Polly, are you still looking for support with XYZ challenge or goal? Warm regards, Andrea." That's it. Simple, direct, and effective.

No fluff, no awkwardness. This kind of message cuts through the noise, revives interest, and often leads to a very quick reply, especially if the timing is right for them. I had a client use this exact message with a lead who had ghosted her for two weeks. The response came back within 10 minutes. "Yes, actually, I am. I am interested. Sorry for the delay. Can we talk tomorrow?" So sometimes simple is powerful.

Now, if you still got no response at day 14, at day 30, I think I would send another message. "Hi, Polly Prospect. I haven't heard back since we connected on XYZ Day last month. I'm going to close the loop on my end, but if you want to revisit this, I'm here, wishing you the best either way."

So notice that we're kind of building there, and we're kind of getting a little more direct and simpler as time goes on.

Today, we reviewed the labeling system: closed yes, closed no, closed no not yet, closed ghost, closed not a good fit. We reviewed the BIG follow-up method: bold interaction, informed interest, genuine guidance. We did some scripts, we talked about timing, and here's what I want you to do.

I want you to pull out that list you created in episode one and choose just one lead. Pick a message to send them that matches the timing and send it. Send it, and then come back and repeat.

This is how you're going to take the emotion out of the follow-up and start leading like the business owner that you really are. Remember, genuine guidance.

So, if you want those templates in writing, plus lifetime access to this series of workshops that I did and a full Q&A session that I hosted, I want you to go grab the No-Ghost Bundle at andrealiebross.com/noghostbundle.

I'm making all of the workshop available to you. I'll even throw in these podcast episodes into the bundle once they all go live. But you can get all of this information in writing. There's an action guide, more scripts, go for it.

So head over to andrealiebross.com/noghostbundle. And remember, if you didn't know about this workshop, you should be on the email list, the newsletter list, andreali​ebross.com/newsletter.

Then next time, in episode three, in the next episode, actually, 226, but episode three of the series, we're going to talk automation. How to create a follow-up system that runs whether you're at your desk or not.

All right, my friends, you've got this. Go follow up. Then I'll see you right back here for the final episode of this three-part Interested to Invested series. See you soon.

Thanks for tuning into the She Thinks Big! Podcast. If you're ready to learn the secret to unleashing your full potential, don't forget to grab a copy of my book, She Thinks Big: The Entrepreneurial Woman's Guide to Moving Past the Messy Middle and Into the Extraordinary. It's available on Amazon and at your favorite bookstore.

And while you're there, grab a copy for a friend. Inside, you'll both find actionable strategies and empowering insights to help you navigate the complexities of entrepreneurship and life, and step confidently into your extraordinary future.

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